Accepting Help

If by no other means than just simply listening to music we should all be able to comprehend that there is not one person who can go through life without needing help at one time or another, and then again.

Submitted for your consideration some song lyrics about help….

“Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends

Mm, gonna try with a little help from my friends”    

“With A Little Help From My Friends”  by Joe Cocker

“I will stand by you

I will help you through

When you’ve done all you can do

If you can’t cope

I will dry your eyes

I will fight your fight

I will hold you tight

And I won’t let go”. 

  “I Won’t Let Go” by Rascal Flatts

“We’ll find out what we’re made of

When we are called to help our friends in need

You can count on me like one, two, three…”

“Count On Me”  by Bruno Mars 

And of course,….

“Help me if you can, I’m feeling down

And I do appreciate you being ’round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won’t you please, please help me?”

“Help!” by The Beatles

Plus there are thousands more, but we all need a little help from our friends, someone who will stand by you and count on like 1,2,3… when you ask won’t you help me please?

So on this edition of Becoming Today we’ll delve into how to accept and why accepting help is so important along our shared journey.

Acknowledging it can be difficult to ask for help, yesterday we began discussing how to ask for help by outlining some steps to allow ourselves to ask for help.

  1. Clarify Your Focus
  2. Get UnComfortable 
  3. If At First You Don’t Succeed,…Get over it. Then try and try again. 
  4. Be Honest with Yourself 
  5. Know What You Want To Ask For
  6. Don’t Ask Just Anyone 
  7. Be Open To Accepting Help
  8. Don’t Take Yourself Too Seriously

At times we all need help. Don’t be embarrassed to ask. Turning to others in times of need should not involve shame. Instead realize it is a  strength. A sign that you have achieved the wisdom that you can not handle everything by yourself. 

Be willing to realize that you may not need the help you think you do. We don’t always require a solution  to the problem we think they have. Sometimes you just need a little guidance. Help in establishing a new direction, finding a new center. 

In asking for help we can receive a change in perspective, inspiration, or some practical encouragement that may result in transforming not only your circumstance, but your life as well.  

You don’t always get what you think you want, but if you try sometimes, you might just get what you need. So now let’s explore what happens when you do try and help is offered….

Instead of resisting help, learn to surrender to it. In learning how to accept Help we are Becoming able to live a life with gratitude. That simple act of true humility is pleasing to God. Accepting of child-like trust, to receive without the burdens of judgment shows we are evolving.  “Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.“ (Matthew 18:3-4 BSB)

Even for those with this knowledge and many who not only know but have understood it as a belief, still accepting help can be uncomfortable. However remember there is no shame in asking for help nor freely accepting it. Giving and receiving  are an integral part of life.

So let’s delve into the question of ‘Why is accepting help difficult?

While a majority of people genuinely enjoy lending others a helping hand, for many it remains tough to be on the receiving end. 

While we know it feels good to support others through acts of kindness there are a few reasons why it remains uncomfortable to embrace the acceptance of the same kind of assistance. 

These include a fear of being vulnerable, having a feeling of unworthiness and those who continue to hold onto shame. Accepting help does not make you weak nor is it a sign that you have failed in some way. If someone is struggling with low self-esteem, they are more than likely also dealing with past beliefs tied to shame or feeling guilty.

As I typed this last paragraph I think those are topics we’ll need to address in depth in a future visit, but for now let’s accept that shame and guilt are unnecessary, unhealthy emotions. Furthermore in regards to our conversation today, you can begin to release them by simply saying, “yes”. Yes I can. Yes, I will accept your help. It truy can set you free.

Here are some steps to assist you in Becoming accepting of help from others.

Examine your beliefs about receiving

Undertake some self questioning to determine what could be causing you to  be hesitant or putting up a barrier of resistance. What’s stopping you from accepting help? Do you feel undeserving? Why?

Allow yourself to be vulnerable

Being vulnerable is not a sign of weakness. In order to accept help, you need to let go of control. That may be the most difficult obstacle to overcome.  Nevertheless it is required in order for others to step in and help.

Feel the love 

Realize most people are willing to give without strings attached. Why? Because they are motivated by love. The most important and fulfilling of all emotions. Feel it. Embrace it. Accept it, then when given the chance share it.

Be grateful

Allow yourself to adopt an attitude of gratitude. Receiving is a beautiful experience, be thankful for it, whether or not it’s happening yet. Practice saying thank you so you may do so in humility when the need arises.

Don’t take away another’s blessing

Afford others an opportunity to give. Receiving isn’t all about you.  Allow a loving well intentioned person to experience the love and gratitude that they will feel when you allow yourself to accept their help.  

Then allow yourself the power to: 

Pay it forward 

Not only do we all experience the need for assistance along the way we are also granted the opportunity to be a blessing to be of service and to ourselves help another.

You don’t need to wait for someone to offer you help to practice receiving. Whenever you need it, simply ask. Allow others the opportunity to help you. In order to accept help, you need to trust the other person and realize you are worthy and deserving.  

At times we all need help. At other times we are all capable of giving help.

Tomorrow we’ll discuss how to make yourself open and available to “Becoming A Giver”.

I pray you are all receiving some help from our daily talks and remember if you feel a need for a little help, you can trust, “You’ve Got Friend” here at Becoming Today.

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