Hello, welcome and I almost can’t find the words to say how glad I am to be rewriting this message. This is not the one I thought you would be reading today.
The conversation I thought we would have to be sharing was not a point in our journey I was ready for. And apparently it was not meant to be. I’ll explain on this edition of “Becoming Today”.
I know fear is such an unnecessary thing, yet I am human. So yes for the past few weeks I was fearing that today we were going to have to say goodbye. I’ve mentioned the past six months of my life have been witness to many unexpected things, that had left me daily in a sheer survival mode.
We had reached a point where it was time for me to renew both the domain and the service I use to bring these discussions forward. In a truly 11th hour testimony to His grace, the means to do so arrived, just at the right moment.
So thanks to His promise and plan co-created with dedication, determination and grit, I again am thankful that we persevere and can move forward for another year.
I am also thankful for your support as well. This has never really been about me, rather what I can share and how I can assist those with what they may be searching for at any given moment.
Sure algorithms, keywords, search engines and subscriptions lead some to join us on our shared path, but I truly believe the ultimate means is through the One who truly knows what is within our hearts and how we need to be becoming.
Just when I thought I would have to post a farewell, he reassured me, that there would be more, and we’ve been join by a number of new followers over these days that were the proverbial darkest before the dawn from my perspective.
Well I can see clearly now again, and I am so happy to see our momentum combining both forward and upward.
I’m glad you’ve chosen to join us and as we prepare to open our next chapter together, it’s that time to look back at the week that was so we can refocus, reenergize and recommit to our daily walk.
On Monday I started “Recalling Realizations“, by noting, we’ll be taking a look at some concepts some of you may have shared with us before. As we’ve now been walking this shared path together for over two years there are some lessons we need to recall and I’m recognizing the realization that many more people have joined us.
We began with a discussion of a time when I came to understand that I was programming garbage within myself.
Years ago, more than I care to admit to, but even at the risk of dating myself (lol), I’ll share it anyways, there was a computer programming acronym “G.I.G.O.” It stood for Garbage In, Garbage Out.
If you programmed garbage, that’s exactly what would be produced by the machine for you. It wasn’t the computer’s fault, it was the operator’s error. Conversely if you programmed with the right sequence, proper language and a formatted design, then you could achieve a desired result.
Flashback forward to the present, and all these decades later, I was putting garbage in my mind, my heart and my soul. So what else could I be able to receive but pure rubbish?
Then it hit me, (finally) that if I wanted to become, I had to make changes. I had to make new commitments. I had to accept new obligations. If I wanted to become something, I had to start, in a very active way. This is where “Becoming” becomes my new way.
And a new way deserves a new acronym, right?
So I’m turning “G.I.G.O.” around and now talking “G.O.G.I.”:
Garbage
Out
Greatness
In
It’s time to take out the trash, put all the rubbish to the curb and get on with “Becoming”.
I was at the lowest point in my life when I discovered ( for lack of a better word, more like was led to kicking and screaming ), this concept. Oh my glass was far less than half full, my vessel was completely bone dry empty. Sometimes you have to be broken down in order to be lifted up. So I was, and it was then I came to understand I had to take some steps to initiate my own renewal.
- Desire.
- Commitment.
- Sustained Efforts.
- Realization of “Becoming”.
I had turned a corner and knew victory was just around the bend.
Tuesday we talked about becoming “Authentic From Within“.
I’ve been thinking about something I know many people ponder, questions and wonder about. Am I living an authentic life?
This is something that I struggled with for years and only within the past few weeks can I honestly answer yes.
Like many for years I viewed it as a destination. “Well I get there.” Thought “maybe, someday”. But we all know “Someday Never Comes”……
It was only when I realized how true that was that I knew I needed to make this a turning point day and get it in gear. Coincidentally ( and I know there is no such thing as coincidence, lol ), I came across some old dog eared notes about 15 steps to living a truly authentic life. Now I have no idea where I originally came across these, as I’ve carried them around for so long, they are written on a steno pad!
I then decided to undertake a 16 – day study and contemplation. One day for each of the suggested steps on this path and then one more for review and analysis.
So I’ll share these inspirations and then some of my responses to hopefully help you to “Becoming” your authentic and amazing life.
Today I’ll just list the 15-steps, you can revisit the earlier post for further explanation.
1. Let your inner light be your guide.
2. Be your highest self.
3. Let go of habits, routines and people that no longer serve you.
4. Speak your truth.
5. Open your mind.
6. Free your heart.
7. Learn to trust intuition.
8. Unchain your spirit.
9. Dive into your strength.
10. Recognize connections.
11. You are of greatest Service when you are happy and healthy.
12. Choose love.
13. Live courageously.
14. Be grateful.
15. Celebrate Life.
It was only through conquering my fears and doubts, accepting help and challenges plus surrendering all that I could that I realized I am now and will continue to by living my truly authentic life. It’s all part of “Becoming” and has delivered me to a place where I can finally honestly, boldly proclaim:
“I love Life. I love the Lord. I love myself”.
By midweek we had to make a decision, about decisions. “From Within: Deciding?”, evoked some personal memories and struggles for me as we talked about how decisions are something that apparently more than a few people have trouble with. As I often have shared, I belong to the schools of thought that teach,…
What happens when you make a decision?
Either it works. Or it doesn’t
Makes perfect sense to me, but even in my own household we dealt with some significant struggles on this topic.
A search for answers in how to deal with it led me to UMass Dartmouth and their criteria for the Seven Steps to Effective Decision making. Now I have no connection with, have never been to and have not ever not knowingly known anyone affiliated with the University of Massachusetts, much less this campus, but their graphic really caught my eye.
Much like “Becoming Today”, their steps were drawn out with motion in two directions. Forward and Upward.
I would also add to step seven. Review your decision and ask, is it worth the risk? Consider the rewards. Oftentimes we must step outside our comfort zone and take a chance in order to receive a significant return on our investment.
Every decision we make. Every action we take are all investments in our “Becoming”. Conversely every action delayed or decision not made have their consequences and those costs can and will compound greatly.
I never said “Becoming” would be easy. I never said “Becoming” would not be uncomfortable or require some risk taking. I do say that “Becoming Today” is worth it.
Thursday was another topic of struggle for many. “Declaring Victory Over Ourselves“, involved recognizing the need to be overcoming procrastination and sometimes procrastinators. Something we all have to address in this process of “Becoming Today”.
So how then do we stop procrastinating?
How do we assist others in overcoming their struggles?
Procrastination can involve not only ignoring an unpleasant task or a difficult decision but always involves failing to undertake a more important task, instead opting to do one that is more enjoyable or easier.
Like all poor decisions there are ramifications. Serious consequences including feelings of guilt and shame. It can also lead us towards a pattern of reduced productivity and failure to achieve our goals, thereby restricting us from “Becoming”.
Extended periods of procrastination can also lead to a complete lack of motivation, disillusionment and depression.
So how do we begin to realize if we are procrastinating or someone in our circle is in danger of earning the label of being a procrastinator? I’m glad you asked, here are some questions in which the responses could reveal the tell tale signs:
- Are you filling your day with low-priority tasks? Just doing busy work?
- Are you leaving an important or vital item or items unchecked on your to-do list for a long time?.
- Do you find yourself starting an important must do then wandering off to find a distraction?
- Are you waiting to be in “the right mood,” or the “perfect time” to get started?
An important first step, we’ve mentioned but it bears repeating. Forgive yourself for procrastinating in the past. Self-forgiveness makes you feel better about yourself , allows you to accept a far more positive mindset and can greatly reduce the possibility of you procrastinating again in the future. Do not be a repeat offender! Free yourself now.
Focus on doing, not avoiding, or just trying to get by. In addition to tracking the tasks you need to get done. Schedule thm. Plan ahead. Hold yourself accountable, within measurable standards. On your daily to-do list include a time to have the item completed by.
Get an anti-procrastination buddy. Find someone who is willing to assist. Ask them to check in on you and aid in your accountability. Positive peer pressure works.
Don’t allow yourself to become overwhelmed. Don’t put it off. Someday never comes and you are more than likely avoiding headaches by simply pushing through and doing it now, rather than later.
Consciously remove yourself from distractions. If you need background noise to focus, ensure it is just that. Something that can be on in the background and not something that will further remove you from your purpose (are you listening, GiGi?).
Change your internal dialogue. Talk with yourself like a coach or mentor would. Don’t dwell on previous failures. Forget about earlier mistakes. Always decide to take steps that are momentum building. Tell yourself your steps should always be forward and upward, not sliding backwards.
And last but certainly not least, give yourself a treat. Positive reinforcement works, just ask your dog. It is more than okay to reward yourself for progress made and change accepted.
Yesterday I shared, “Only You Can Be You“. No two are exactly alike, nor were we intended to be. That’s why only you can be you.
Sounds simple, right? Well just maybe it’s one of those things that sounds easier than they really are. Nevertheless, accepting ourselves is an integral part of “Becoming Today”.
Accepting our strengths rather than empowering our perceived weaknesses, accepting our unlimited potential rather than self imposing limitations.
What exactly does that mean? To start with you need to accept the reality of your life.
Not your own version of reality, rather a hardcore assesment of wher you are nd where you want to be. You may need to overcome many things including regret, denial. Or past failures and disappointments.
Yes we should practice positive self -talk but a true failure to connect with reality can not only be disheartening, but also sets us up for failure. In some cases it can also be quite dangerous, putting us at risk of hurting others as well as ourselves.
Here are the 8 steps of acceptance that I’ve learned along my path towards “Becoming”:
- Accept Yourself. Embrace the ability to unconditionally love all aspects of who you are. Both the positive and negative.Do not become overly critical. It all starts with the proper attitude.
- Accept that Accepting Reality is not the easiest thing to do. However acceptance of your current scenario will ultimately make you happier in the present , which then leads to a better future. Accepting your reality will help you choose your steps properly and keep the momentum moving forward and upward.
- Accept Truthful and Complete Honesty. When you get past your ego, then you can allow for the creation of beautiful new you. Denial will not make the negative go away.
- Accept Personal Responsibility. In order to fully accept your reality, you must take ownership of any role you may have played, good or bad, in leading you to where you are. When you do, then you can work on decisions for the next steps.
- Accept Your Mistakes. You can’t fix anything until you acknowledge you have a problem. Look at your mistakes not as failures but as learning opportunities. Reky on the power within for the strength to co-create your reality.
- Accept Ownership. Own all of it. Not just the challenges but also your strengths and success. Taking ownership of all your outcomes can teach you to do better, and that overcoming leads to a learning moment.
- Accept Power Over Your Fears. Do not let fear rule. Fears of what others think of you, fear of making a decision, fear of not being popular, is all demoralizing. It adds nothing to your experience. Realize that “they” will criticize, judge you, or ridicule you no matter what, so who cares?
- Accept Goal Setting and Planning. Clearly state your intention, desires and establish standards and practices. Ensure you have small steps in the plan to allow for immediate and quick accountability. Stick to it. “Becoming” can truly begin to happen once you have a plan with specific goals.
So we have reached the crescendo of another week of walking our shared path. Come Monday, we’ll be back to take the next step on this journey we call “Becoming Today”.
Becoming Today with Rochelle Jeanette 