This past week we focused on “UnLearning”. This is a process that I have been actively dealing with again in my most recent season of life. In yesterday’s post, you can revisit the key areas that I’ve been working through. I am happy to say I have learned some valuable lessons, though some of these areas, doubt, fear, scarcity have overlapped in recent months, causing me to battle through the depths of emotions.
I had to admit this has been where I had been residing for the last few weeks, actually all month long. The depths of dormancy had overtaken me as I found myself in a bit of a funk.
A malaise. Sub-par; less than average. Not at all where I wanted to be.
At times I felt like I was in a tomb, now on this edition of “Becoming Today”, we’ll explore how I got out.
Isn’t it ironic that you are asked to be the strongest when you feel the weakest?
That was what I was going through, trying to battle the physical issues to keep up with day to day tasks. As I struggled with my inability to perform I had no choice but to reflect on why I may be going through this. I still really don’t have all the answers and probably never will but certainly I knew what it would take to overcome.
Time. Plus trust.
I needed to slow down on some of the busy work and use this time to reflect upon deeper issues.
I asked myself, why am I trying so hard to do these things? I needed to release my perceived responsibilities and focus on why are you thinking what you think?
I needed to release all that felt toxic or was substandard or of minimal importance in the grand scheme of things. It was an opportunity to fortify my internal world and focus on my inner resilience. For I knew my Faith would again overcome this time of bleakness as it has so many times in the past.
Being caught up in feeling sorry or considering myself worthless at the moment would not help. I had to shift my focus and fight to open my eyes and lift them above.
Prayer would strengthen me and enable me to endure. Abiding by this principle I came to realize that this time was something I needed to undergo. I had to suffer patiently, living through this experience in obedience to remain stable.
As it is written in John 15 verse 7, “If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you”.
It was in response to my calls for guidance and understanding that everything I believed was hindering me, was actually there as a way of ;lifting me up, of healing me, of giving me the strength to roll away the stone of this tomb I pictured myself in.
Just as in the story of Lazarus, Jesus would not move the stone, or order an army of Angels to do it. I needed to put my faith into action, show the fortitude of my belief and patiently, persistently, forbearantly move forward in belief.
Just as Jesus instructed Lazarus’ loved ones, I needed to roll away the stone. I had to make the choice to allow HIm in and lead me in a renewed direction.
It was time for me to “take off the grave clothes” and walk out; back into the light.
So I did.
Yes it did take a few days for me to steady myself, regain my strength and clear my vision.
It is during our darkest moments we must focus to see the light.
It was at this time I received some personal revelation knowledge, which I will share with you now, as well as my prayerful response that followed:
You are like the butterfly struggling to escape its cocoon.
Relax. Strengthen. When the time is right, you will take flight!
Multiply your talents.
Have an expectancy of Hope while living in faith this day.
Do not over focus on the return.
Live the Now.
Make the most of each day for the season you are in.
It is winter.
You are in a period of dormancy; nurturing to Spring forth and blossom anew.
Invest in your excellence. Always remembering:
The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him;
Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false.
Though it linger, wait for it; iIt will certainly come and will not delay.
Wait on the TRUTH, not the bustle of society.
Do not wait for people to tap or nudge you.
Listen within. You will KNOW what to do.
God’s timing is never slow or late.
It is okay to ask for encouragement. You have not, because you ask not.
Ask to be given a glimpse of your Promise fulfilling.
It will be granted, but you must ask. Ask for and receive your glimmer of Hope today.
I scribbled the above in my journal and then after taking a moment to allow it all to sink in, drafted this reply:
Thank you Lord for assisting and guiding me. I appreciate your support, assistance and love and I am humbly and obediently accepting and welcoming it.
Each day I invite you into my life. Today, I ask that you encourage me. Affirm me in my faith. Help me to see what I must embrace, accept and act upon to continue always being “Becoming”. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen!
That is when I found the strength to get up and push that stone out of my way. Breathing in the refreshed air and enhanced light to get back onto my own personal path towards “Becoming Today”.